Time to Call on St Michael

Since revisiting my efforts to live within the cloister of God's will, it seems Satan is on the attack.  I have fallen and badly sprained both ankles. Our family vehicle was rear-ended on the way to the store.  And my daughter has a very bad cold / bronchitis.  It is as if Satan is strongly against this effort.  Yet, I know that God is greater, and for the sake of my family, I ask St. Michael the Archangel for his protection as I continue. 

 I am amazed at the resistance I'm encountering in this effort. I am just one ordinary soul trying to live God's will in my life. I am not doing the best, really.  I'm managing to avoid mortal sin and I'm still prone to much venial sin and selfishness. My circle of influence is not a broad one -- just my family and my students.  My vocation right now is a simple one -- to serve God and my family through my home life and by teaching religion in my daughter's school.

As I write these words, a dark presence is hovering ominously over our home as my mother-in-law jumps up in a rage over something my daughter has done. OUR LADY OF PEACE, pray for us.  Guide me, Mary, to remain calm and respond in a spirit of charity in order to be an example and protector of this precious little soul you have entrusted to me. Lord, send my mother-in-law peace of spirit! Aging is hard, no doubt. But with a defiant little two-year-old in the house, and a jittery little dog who's forgotten how to be housebroken-- I'm amazed her blood pressure isn't higher than it already is.  I'm amazed mine isn't high too.

But each time these moments arise, and each time words are held back so that peace prevails (as it has now), we have a small gift to offer God.  A gift of perseverence in the tiniest of trials. Moments such as these are all I have to give.

Lord, help me live in Your Will!  Help me resist the devil!  Protect my family, and guide my efforts to serve my family and instruct my students in a way that pleases You. 

Through Jesus' most Holy Name, I offer this little prayer and all my efforts....   Amen.

Discipline in this Cloister is Up to Me

Months have passed since I began this effort. My days have been extremely busy, and my prayer life is not what it could or should be. I am so like a novice in a cloister, but without a wise superior to reign me in and bring out the best in me.

I continue to seek God's will in each and every day, but I get lost in the busywork and am so easily distracted. Since I began this journal, I have begun homeschooling my daughter and teaching four classes at a local Catholic homeschooling cooperative.  This has been such a blessing. I feel it is a work God is calling me to...and just hope I am able to be open to his graces to help me do it well. Yet, I know I am one to fall prey to taking on too much and later letting it all slide. Already, I have neglected other commitments to be sure my lessons are ready to go each day.

And my biggest challenge lately is that of "reigning in" my words. St James was so right when he wrote of the tongue as a fire!  Seems I am always stamping out little wildfires that spring up when I forget to guard my words carefully.  No wonder so many religious adhere to silence!  I may open my lips with the aim of "defending" myself but so often end up going on the offensive instead.  Why do I find it so hard to let the Spirit come to my aid, sheddling light on the truth of matters when I am in the right and helping me see clearly what needs to change when I'm not? I must be talking too much, for when it comes to disciplining my daughter, I feel ignored, like a clanging symbol! Does what I say seep in at all?  Yet, I know she is watching, even if she isn't actively listening.  And how often do I hear her repeating back things I or other family members have said? Not all are flattering.

The duties of my daily life beckon me...so I must end for now. My prayer is for the Holy Spirit to serve as my guide and superior in my efforts. The discipline I need must come from within, with the aid of God's good Helper. 

Amen.